life's a bitch aint it.. why does the world hate me? i wonder why? i feel like uhmm..a bird with no wings and the hunters are after me yet i cant fly for shit.. its a weird feeling..its like i feel worthless, like a granule of dirt.. why do i feel like this? well i cant answer that coz i just dont know..maybe i'm in the matrix and the architect is after me..yeah you've guessd it..i just watched matrix reloaded..DVD..HuzzAhh.. anyways its weird..and this whole internet thing just bores the living zombie out of me. oh yeh i burned myself many times coz of deep thoughts and spaciousness, my left hand looks zombie-ish..its weird..again i used the word "weird." aint that weird?..hmm where's the excitement..i need it..i'm losing control over myself..i must unleash the ivan..the real ivan..right now he's covered with emotional shitness and this shit aint coming off till someone finds out a way to make me feel like myself again.. i'm screwed, i'm such a total joke..jokes of all joksters..boooo..what an outrage..i'm goin crazy...could someone just shoot me...Plaw* Plaw*.. just shoot me is the most retarded show ever..RETARDed!.. "pull the trigger and the nightmare stops" (coheed and cambria) yeah that band rocks the EMO out of me..but not the ivan.. but still its the greatest band alive..thanks to Parker Lemus for introducing me to his PUNK/EMO world or whatever he calls it.. the LORD CATSWORTH world.. this is the end.. plaw* plaw* drops dead..